non-event.

well i turn 42 today, business as usual.woke in a daze from only 4hrs of zzs trundled to school. tried to avoid thinking of anything remotely depressing haha with the mantra, 'one year to live' in head.

slew of fb wishes which i will eventually mass-thank and like haha. i'm just feeling so sluggish about the whole day. end work at 5, will chuck for a quickie workout and nua. so you see, it'll be ok. the ocassional moments bite but i'll just have to bash through and live fierce. there's no point over-sentimentalizing a date which never mattered before a r/s. it was always just a day everyone suddenly pays attention, smth i'm not always a fan of.
these days i just want to walk on, function and fulfill. no energy for platitudes or pleasantries.

i'm not cynical really. just feel all this pomp in unnecessary for a date in a year. i'm just happier that i'm one step closer to final transcending into that end-light.

and ytf aunty treated me to a free brekkie. bless her heart. another i want to bestow whatever life years i have left on. so far it's my kids, my parents, my sibs, darinee, chris, and assorted angels who truly deserve to live long good lives. i bestow all my years to these lovely souls. i only need one more year.