deceit.

that sums up humanity to a tee.
it started with the whole myth behind the origins of man. whoever pulled that story over everyone's eyes must've been the devil himself. how else could generations buy up a story like that despite obvious physical proof of dinosaur fossils?

but allegorically perhaps, the first lie ever told by a fictional character was probably captured by an ancient scribe who wanted to expound the consequence of deceit, but some nimwit probably took the Fall-story too literally and went on to proliferate the greatest lie ever told. talk about going viral B.C

today i learned an empirical truth of sorts, an equation of folly if you will. those who are honest to a fault will ultimately be screwed over by others who are incapable of honesty. the former will completely trust the other with his heart and soul only because he is born with a trusting nature, while the other in the sheer balance of the universe will deceive and take him for everything he has.

i know this for a fact because i lived it for the past 3years. i gave nothing but my truth to a r/s which turns out to be built upon falsehood and lies. yup, i was screwed over and used, to satisfy some youthful whim in a bad cliche of sugar-mommy complex, where one was merely looking for love and the other exploited it for lust; though ultimately no fault of either party because nature has to even out its elements to maintain some form of order. for every deception, there has to be a deceived.

in hindsight, perhaps the worst of it was self-deception, when one convinces self that the other is true only to perpetuate the artifice for fear of a more painful realisation. so if any form of blame must be acknowledged, it ultimately rests on myself for participating in that lie in some attempt to find another false construct we like to call 'happiness'.

what it all comes down to is that simple premise: that honesty is seldom returned equally because humanity is incapable of sustaining any kind of unconditional love when selfish needs drive the core of our being.

which is why the only honest creature i trust is my dog. she is incapable of fabricating anything other than her bowel movements

in any case, i'm glad i've finally seen the light. it only affirms why i loathe this place and its pretense. all i know is i will leave it with my truth intact. and everything else is moot.

namaste.